I recently came across an article on prenups. In this article there was a sentence that stood out to me, not because of how true a statement it was but because of how off base it was. “Negotiating a prenup is not romantic and can destroy couples’ feelings for each other forever.” Really? If talking about finances, spending habits, worst case scenarios, and how to plan for a successful future is going to destroy your feelings for your intended, then you probably shouldn’t be getting married in the first place.
I’m not denying that negoiagating a prenup can be a harrowing experience but that is usually reserved for those who have something to hide, who are only in it for the money, or who don’t want to be fair (as I always say “life’s not fair but your prenup has to be.”) A prenup is really about having an open conversation about money, expectations, and your future. This is an important conversation that all couple need to have. It is one that many do not having before skipping down the aisle on their way to happily ever after and that is often why half of that couple ends up calling me about a divorce 5, 7, or 10 years later.
A prenup is not going to destroy your feelings about your future spouse, finding out who they really are when you ask the tough questions might though.
